Part 32: Shut Your Gob!
Update 33: Shut Your Gob!Spikemuth - Pokémon Sword and Shield OST
As we go right, we run into what looks like a merch stand.
Grunt: ‘Old on, mate. If you’re gonna take on the Gym mission, you’d better change into yer uniform!
While every Gym so far has had both a gimmick and some Trainers, the Spikemuth Gym just has the second. Instead of figuring out some puzzles, you go through the Team Yell Grunts checkpoint by checkpoint, whether in single or double battles.
The closest thing there is to an obstacle here is the occasional Kantonian Mr. Mime walling off the path. Now, there IS a Galarian Mr. Mime, an Ice-type, but we’re dealing with the original version here. Mr. Mimes sit firmly on the slopes of the Uncanny Valley. Those ear things and fixed smile have been terrifying young players for generations. Mr. Mime’s worst qualities even made it into Detective Pikachu, and the fact that that movie exists still completely blows my mind. But the most interesting piece of trivia about it? In the anime, the main character, Ash, doesn’t have a father. Nobody ever makes a big deal of it, their family is perfectly happy and stable without him, but it’s all pretty mysterious. In the first part of the anime, Ash’s mom also keeps a Mr. Mime around the house to do chores. No wonder he left home so quickly.
When I was still keeping up with the fandom, there were four competing theories as to who Ash’s father was:
- He was some rando who left them long ago and will never show up again (probably the canon explanation).
- He was Giovanni, the closest thing Gen 1 had to a major villain.
- He was Professor Oak, the local equivalent of Prof. Magnolia, Sonia, and more rolled together, who did everything from giving you your Pokédex and first Pokémon to calling you up every time you used your bike indoors telling you to knock it off (probably the most popular theory).
- She fucked the Mr. Mime.
Grunt: Gym Challenger.
The first fight starts out… A little rough. By that I mean the first time someone lands an attack on my Pokémon, the Linoone OHKOs L337 on the spot. So, that’s pretty promising. It still goes down to Baklava, though, and that’s all she wrote.
Grunt: But, since I lost, it was really all for nothin’! Whatever. You won, so I guess I’ll step aside.
Wait! I, uh, I have something to ask you.Grunt: Eh, go ahead.
Do… Do you know about me and Marnie?Grunt: Yer askin’ if we approve?
Well, yes. Grunt: Then why you askin’ ME that? It’s not like we’re all one person. I swear…
No – look. Marnie is very important to me, and you guys are VERY important to her. But I don’t know anything about Spikemuth, I really don’t. Just rumors and stereotypes. I was hoping to… I dunno, break them? I mean, I’m not going to make you tell me anything, but I really want to get to know you better.Grunt: You know what? Sure. Outsiders never ask that. So, what d’you know about Spikemuth?
Not much. I know a little bit about Muneth. Did you know the true heirs to the throne of Galar are somewhere around here? The last members of the Alfredic Dynasty vanished into the Munethic countryside and with the Brother Kings’ line having given up their right to succession after the Revolution, they stand first in line to the throne.Grunt: Points for knowin’ Muneth’s name, but that’s ancient history. Nobody in Spikemuth cares about that.
This is what I need – I don’t KNOW any of this. What’s it like living here?Grunt: Well… hm. I bet yer thinkin’ about Wooloo-shaggin’ jokes.
I’m Cameran. Galarians make the same jokes about us.Grunt: Maybe. But I ain’t never even SEEN a Wooloo, you know? Me da was a binman and me mum runs a corner shop, so me an’ my sisters were a bit better off than most. Gwen here, though, she grew up without a father. Her mum’s a wonder though.
I don’t know who my father is and I don’t care to find out. He and my family abandoned my mum when I was small and she raised me better than he ever could.Gwen: Yeah! See, she gets it…
…
… I mean, she talks about synthesizers all the time, but she never seems to want to talk about actually playing them much.Left Grunt: Yeah, both her and Piers. I don’t get it.
I dunno, a lot of artists like to keep their work personal. But then, Piers heads up a band, so…Right Grunt: He’s a private man, our Piers. Humble, too. The whole wild-eyed punk rocker thing? It’s a front. He’s a sweet man under there. Part of why we like him so much.
Left Grunt: You know he runs his own label?
What, really?Left Grunt: It’s true. He publishes ‘alf the bands out of Spikemuth, then funnels all the money back to them. Financial genius, that one. He talks about music bein’ pretty maths all the time…
…
They jump out the windows and the camera cuts away. It returns once they land.
Wait! Weren’t you the bloke that tried to steal that bike?Left Grunt:You tried to steal a bike?
Right Grunt: I did NOT try to steal a bike! I just wanted t’ borrow the damn thing!
And use it to ride down Challengers.Left Grunt:You were going to do WHAT?
Right Grunt: I… Okay, I KNOW it was a bloody stupid idea. I KNOW. I just… I just wanted to be a bit more active, you know?
As in… Stay fit, or…Right Grunt: No, not like that! By then everybody else’d scared off most of the Challengers. I wanted to do SOMETHING.
Left Grunt: Leigh, mate, that’s a terrible idea no matter how ya look at it.
Well, he didn’t cause anybody any harm. Plus, it was a Rotombike, so he couldn’t use it anyway.Left Grunt: Bloody hell, really? That’s amazin’!
Right Grunt:
Left Grunt:
…
Uh –
Wait wait wait, Hitmonchan Adventures!Left Grunt: What?
Right Grunt: Oh shit.
That entrance! Right down to whipping out the scrolls at the end! What was it, the Dark-type Hand? That was their thing!Left Grunt: … Was it now. Y’know, I remember bein’ told a certain someone came up with it all by herself.
Right Grunt: Come the hell on, Megan, you said you thought it was cool!
But it IS cool! That was a GREAT show. Well, it was all right. But I did like those little educational segments at the end!Right Grunt: You’re kiddin’ me, mate, the fight scenes in the first couple seasons were mad!
Left Grunt: Oh God, I remember you talkin' about that. You never shut up about it!
Right Grunt: Only because you wouldn’t watch it with me!
You know you can stream it for free off the network’s website now? You have to put up with adverts, but…Right Grunt: …
Left Grunt:
…
You know, I kinda had a sneaking suspicion. Does Marnie know that you lot’ve been intercepting Challengers?Grunt: No, ‘course not!
You know, maybe I don’t know Marnie as well as you do, but I got the impression she isn’t a fan of people lying to her.Grunt: We weren’t lyin'! We were just... Not tellin' her.
It’s only a matter of time before she finds out, you know…Grunt:
…
What do you know…
… Looks like I called it.